What I did in November: Pondered M.Nights career trajectory, was disappointed by yet another Brit flick and enjoyed some good old fashioned kung fu.

The Happening: It seems that M.Night Shyamalan's career is going to go the same way as John Carpernter's. He started off so well with The Sixth Sense, a tad overrated perhaps but then followed it up with the classic Unbreakable and the scary Signs. The Village was good not great but then Lady In The Water sucked, it just plain sucked and before you protest, I fully understood what he was trying to do with it and he didn't come close. After that you would hope the The Happening would be something of a return to what Shyamalan does best. Sadly this is one of the worst films of the year. It starts well enough and has a fairly solid story at its core. After twenty minutes however and a contrived scene featuring an elderly lady with an I-Phone and YouTube footage of a man feeding himself to lions it all goes wrong. Nothing works here beyond the first few deaths, it plays out like a film made up of all the alternate takes that you usually get as DVD extras and the performances are all off. See it if you are curious but it really is as bad as people are making out.*

Quantum of Solace: I liked Quantum of Solace, in fact I like it more as I get more distance from it. Its not perfect but its still far better than most of the Bond films of the 80's and 90's. At the start we are thrown into a middle of a car chase with Bond and his suspect from the end of Casino Royale in his trunk. From there it doesn't pause for breath and perhaps this is the problem with the movie. Casino Royale had a cool and tense card game and moving love story at its core, there isn't really anything like that here. Bond in this film is on the rampage and Daniel Craig continues to play a Bond that you believe could actually hurt people. The best scene in this movie is when Bond is at the opera tailing a suspect and listens in to the conversation between several members of the mysterious Quantum and as they get up to leave we see just how vast the organization is amongst the wealthy and powerful. This scene is a moment on par with the poker game from Royale but sadly the scenes that make up the rest of QOS are shaky camera action scenes, exciting though they are you cant help but wish the writers had left a few more pauses in the movie. Another thing that is great about Quantum of Solace is the way they are continuing to develop the relationship between Bond and M played by Judi Dench. M was never really given much development in previous films but here we see that although she bollocks him for his methods secretly she knows that by letting Bond off the leash things will get done. I can't understand the negative reviews for this one, people complaining that Bond needs to have more fun are perhaps missing the point. too much fun is what lead to Die Another Day. Royale was the seed and Quantum of Solace works as a short, sharp and thrilling bridge to wherever they are going next. Personally I cannot wait to see this series continue.  ****

Donkey Punch: On one level Donkey Punch is a savage condemnation of both the class system and brits behaving badly abroad. Three low class slappers go to Ibiza or somewhere in Spain to get drunk and sleep around. They get picked up by three creepy upper class types and their sleazy working class mate. They go back to the posh yacht they are staying at and cast out to sea. Whilst there, ugly working class bloke deals drugs and suggests a sordid sexual practice that leads to the death of one of the girls. There is then discussion about what to do and one of the slappers overreacts to everything and kills two of the yuppies horribly. During this the quiet and more reserved of the girls makes some seriously retarded decisions. Whilst on a yacht off the coast of Spain she thinks it would be a good idea to dial 999 to the police back in England, yeah that will help. She then follows this up by running through a glass window to escape capture and then winces as she pulls glass from her leg. On another more realistic level Donkey Punch is a good idea, badly written and badly acted and not very pleasant for anyone, least of all the audience.  *

Speed Racer: I really wanted to love Speed Racer. I wanted to feel exhilarated and amazed with my jaw on the floor as I watched the first really faithful translation of a Japanese anime come to life. I wanted that feeling I had when I first watched Sin City or 300. Sadly although the visuals are impressive for most of the running time, the Waschowski brothers have shot themselves in the feet by being too faithful. Yes and I know how that sounds. The movie starts well enough with a quick re-cap of the Racer family history and the suspicious death of older brother and racing champ Rex Racer. We then see that Rex' little brother Speed is coming up fast on the racing circuit working for his father Pops and their independent racing company. Speed is approached by Royalton industries and offered a lucrative deal which he turns down in favor of remaining with his fathers outfit. Royalton does not take this well and Speed is exposed to a conspiracy within the racing circuit regarding fixed races. Along with the mysterious Racer X he must bring an end to the corruption. Initially the races are thrilling and only a few times do you feel that you are trapped in a giant bag of skittles being shaken around mercilessly. The performances are all great, especially Matthew Fox as Racer X who shows real star quality here. Around halfway through though you are rudely reminded that this is y'know for kids when Spritle (Speeds other brother) and his pet monkey steal a load of sweets from a private jet and then go on the rampage through Royalton industries. Then they follow this up with a fight scene right out of the 60's Batman TV series and even give the monkey a moment where he leaps in the air with anime speed lines behind him. Sadly at this point I tuned out. Similar to the complaints people had about the Star Wars prequels, Speed Racer has a plot about corruption and bribery whilst also making a monkey the comic relief. Star Wars did not have a monkey but it had Jar Jar and farting droids. This just does not meld and the film is a bit of a mess. Having said all that its quite a hard film to hate as it has a lot of heart and come the final race you'll find it hard to hold back a tear at the outcome.  ***

Zack and Miri make a Porno: Kevin Smith produces a lot of very interesting and varied reactions from people, especially on the Internet where people seem to love to pile on the hate as well as quote a lot from his screenplays. If I had to pick one writer/director of recent times that has been an influence on my writing more than any other then it would probably be Silent Bob himself. I find it flabbergasting that people are saying that Smith here is trying to imitate Judd Apatow, surely Apatow's films so far have been heavily indebted to Smiths work right? Clerks 2 proved that Smith could combine potty mouth humor and gross out with his sweet sentimental side and Zack and Miri Make a Porno continues in that vein. It may well end up being my favorite comedy of the year at years end. Seth Rogen is right at home in a Smith flick, he speaks the lingo as if he wrote it himself. Elizabeth Banks is also very alluring as the best friend and object of buried affection. The two leads are ably supported by Jason Mewes being pretty much himself except more 80 per cent more pornstar and Craig Robinson from The Office as Rogens co-worker who gets all of the best lines here. This film is a real crowd pleaser as it works as a Farrelly Brothers style comedy as well as a romantic comedy in the Cameron Crowe/Apatow vein. Special mention must also go to the soundtrack, I swear its like Smith raided my MP3 player for this one. Kicking off with Winona's Big Brown Beaver by Primus, continuing with Sex and Candy by Marcy Playground and concluding with We Don't Have to Take Our Clothes Off by Michael Jackson's brother Jermaine. Myself from ten years ago was in aural heaven.  ****

Kung Fu Panda: Dreamworks animations so far have not really been much of a success as far as I'm concerned. Shrek 1 and 2, fair enough but then you have the uninspiring likes of Shark Tale, Madagascar and Bee Movie to think about. Over the Hedge though kicked ass. Kung Fu Panda is their best effort so far, its got a simple story of a loveable portly panda wanting to be a kung fu master and learning to succeed on his own terms. More importantly it does not have the pop culture references that the other movies do and so will not date badly. Also for an animated movie aimed at kids the fight scenes really feel quite harsh, especially the scene in which Tai Lung escapes from his prison guarded by Rhino's. If only the makers of TMNT has followed this template then that film may not have been quite as forgettable. Oh yeah and its really funny as well with great voice casting. ****

The Forbidden Kingdom: Another movie inspired by far eastern shenanigans that had no right being as good as it was. Jet Li and Jackie Chan facing off is like the Hong Kong film fan equivalent of De Niro and Pacino in Heat. Eyebrows were raised when it was announced that this would be in a kids film from the director of the Stuart Little movies. Well he showed us as this is an absolute blast from start to finish. The Forbidden Kingdom is clearly made by people with a deep love of everything that has come out of Hong Kong from the seventies onwards and this is the key to its success. Its something the makers of Cradle 2 the Grave and the Rush Hour movies didn't really comprehend. Trying to make Jet Li and Jackie Chan fit into an archetypal American movie was never going to work and missed the point of why we liked them in the first place. Jackie Chan has not been as good in an American movie as he is here, he reveals a charm and awesomeness that was not even present in Shanghai Noon. Here he is playing a variation on his Drunken Master character. Jet Li as well also looks for the first time in ages like he is having tons of fun in this movie, playing two characters who are flipsides of the same mischievous coin. Michael Angarino as the American kid drawn into this world does a solid job with an underwritten role and this is what holds this film back from an additional star for me. We meet his character and find out he is into Hong Kong flicks and that's about it. A bit more development would have meant we would have had more sympathy with his journey. This is a minor complaint though when you have kick ass fight scenes choreographed by Yuen Woo Ping, breathtaking scenery and two masters at the top of their game. I haven't even mentioned the opening credits yet, one of the best sequences for a long time! ****